book Archives - The Average Churchman

Cultivating an Others-centered Mindset

By Adam Nesmith | June 14, 2021

I don’t think I need to argue that human beings are naturally self-centered. It isn’t for nothing that the Bible says to “love your neighbor as yourself” and “in humility consider others more important than yourself”. Our natural bent is to self-love and preoccupation with our own needs. So how do you cultivate an others-centered mindset?

It is not easy. But this past week I read an excellent little book that has a chapter which speaks to this issue. The book is called “The Hidden Art of Homemaking” by Edith Schaeffer. Don’t let the title fool you: the book is a marvelous study of how everyday activities can become God-honoring, creative expressions for the Christian. It addresses both men and women and I highly recommend you read it. One of the latter chapters contains an excellent quote which I want to look at today:

We produce the environment other people have to live in.
Edith Schaeffer

What the quote means

Your behavior has a definite effect on others

What I love about this quote is it awakens a new awareness: your behavior directly affects other people. Your behavior makes part of the world other people have to live in. The main point of this chapter in “The Hidden Art of Homemaking” is you can positively and creativity add good to another person’s life. How you act, your attitude, what you value all create an environment other people have to live in.

Put another way, nothing you do is “neutral”. Everything you do, everything you are, affects the people you come in contact with. If you are always sad or dour or depressed, it isn’t just “your problem”. Edith Schaeffer gives the example in the book of a coworker who is always complaining. After talking with such a person, do you ever feel motivated in your own work?

On the other hand, if you interact with a joyful person, a motivated person you yourself often start to feel motivated and more joyful. You daily, moment by moment create a little “world” by your behavior, character, and values which other people enter and interact with you in. Your life has an active role in the lives of other people.

Why it is important

An others-centered mindset means noticing how your behavior affects other people

If you are aware that your personal behavior creates an environment for other people to live in, it becomes easier to become others-centered. The awareness that you are moment by moment having an impact on other people’s lives (whether you like it or not) causes you to start asking the question “What kind of environment am I creating for this other person right now?“

As Christians, the type of environment you should want to create is clear: a Christ-centered, God-glorifying, holy and beautiful environment. It can become very easy to not even think about how your life affects other people. But once your mind grabs on to the idea that you are continuously creating the environment other people live in, you can start actively and intentionally shaping that environment.

An “others-centered mindset” starts with realizing other people exist around you and that your behavior impacts them.

Personally, this quote from “The Hidden Art of Homemaking” has made me more aware of people around me. Rather than just thinking of myself and how I feel in every single social interaction, I start asking myself “Am I creating a Christ-centered environment for this person? How can I better this person’s life in a small way with this interaction?”

Takeaways

1. Remind yourself that you are commanded to love others as yourself

It is not enough to simply realize your life affects others. You must also remember Scripture’s commands with regards to how you treat others:

Love your enemies.
Outdo one another in showing honor.
Forgive as you have been forgiven.

Cultivating an others-centered mindset does not just stop with creating a “positive environment” in interacting with others. There is nothing overtly Christian about a “positive environment.” Your interactions with others must be in obedience to Scripture’s commands in order to truly have a “positive” effect on those around you.

Don’t settle for “positive interactions.” Pursue loving, Christ-centered, God-exalting interactions.

And I don’t think it is a stretch to add that loving, Christ-centered, God-exalting interactions often include explicit discussion and sharing of Scripture.

2. Take a thoughtful and active role in your interactions with others

I am more and more convinced that having an others-centered mindset means taking the initiative when interacting with other people. You pursue the other person. You start the conversation. When there is a lull, you keep the conversation going. You ask insightful questions to get to the heart whatever issue you are discussing.

If it is true that you and I create the environment other people live in, then we probably should become more thoughtful when we interact with others. Personally, I have thought more about how my daily behaviors (even in the little things) affect my wife. How are my actions creating a Christ-honoring environment for her? Am I acting in a way that is making it easier for her to live in obedience to Christ or harder?

And once you do that reflection, you can actively pursue an environment you desire. In the case of my wife, it might mean asking her spiritually-focused questions. Or it might mean giving up my own desires to serve her around the house. An others-centered mindset takes responsibility for the part you play in the lives of others. I would argue this mindset starts and primarily plays out in the home: how you interact with your spouse and children.

3. Realize every interaction is a God-given opportunity

Probably my favorite takeaway from this Edith Schaeffer quote is the exalted perspective it gives to the mundane. You interact with dozens of people daily. Oftentimes, they are not “important” people like Presidents or world leaders. They are also often not “important” interactions. It might be a few minutes here, a conversation there, or a chat over a meal.

But once you realize you are creating the environment other people live in, even little interactions become opportunities. You stop going from one thing to the next aimlessly. Every single time you cross paths with another human being, God is giving you an opportunity. The question is will you take advantage of the opportunity or not? If you truly believe that God is absolutely sovereign, there are no accidental interactions.

So have thoughtful and prayerful interactions with others. Don’t let opportunities pass you by. Every day you contribute to the life, environment, and world of other people. Choose, in obedience to Scripture, to make that world more holy and God-glorifying through your actions, values, and words.

I highly recommend you purchase and read “The Hidden Art of Homemaking.” Click here to read about other books I recommend. Be sure to follow The Average Churchman on Instagram to get more weekly content and subscribe below so you don’t miss out on future posts.

4 Christ-centered Books to Read This Easter

By Adam Nesmith | March 31, 2021

Reading is one of my favorite things to do. My shelves are full of books I have read, books I am reading, and books I want to read in the future. As Easter approaches, I thought I would give four Christ centered books I recommend reading.

In this post, I will go through each of the books and give a brief summary of what I personally found helpful. Each of these Christ centered books have helped me understand Jesus and His work at a deeper level. I hope they will help you in the same way.

The Seven Sayings of the Saviour on the Cross by A. W. Pink

I picked up this book for a dollar or so at a book sale. After reading it, I would have paid a whole lot more for this gem of a book. The book focuses exclusively on seven last phrases Jesus said on the cross as recorded in the four gospels. Because of the way it is structured, it is an incredibly easy book to read and think through.

The demands of justice must be met; the requirements of God’s holiness must be satisfied; the awful debt we incurred must be paid. And on the Cross this was done; done by none less than the Son of God; done perfectly; done once for all. “It is finished.”
A W Pink

I absolutely loved this Christ centered book. By expounding each of these seven sayings, Pink shows you as a reader what Jesus accomplished through His death. Each saying is a jumping off point for a larger discussion of Christ’s character, His work, and His heart towards those around Him. I recommend this book frequently and if you want a book to focus your mind on Christ, it is an amazing Easter read.

His Blood Works: The Meaning of the Word “Blood” in Scripture by Alan M. Stibbs

This is a lesser known book, but it is rich in teaching. Essentially, the book is a Biblical Theology of “blood” through the entirety of the Bible. In tracing “blood” through Scripture, Stibbs helps you understand the significance and importance of Jesus having to shed His blood for our sins.

Blood is a vivid word symbol for referring to someone’s violent death and for connecting other people with the consequences (positive or negative) resulting from it.
Alan Stibbs

The book is very short and consumable. You could read through it in a day, or stretch it out a couple days if you want. Stibbs shows you just how important Christ shedding His blood is to Christianity. It isn’t “cosmic child abuse” or disgusting to talk about and sing about Jesus shedding His blood for believers. It is the heart of the Gospel.

Rejoicing in Christ by Micheal Reeves

This small book is a well-written and insightful introduction to Christology. It is one of the most Christ-centered books I have read in the past few years. I enjoyed it so much I read the whole book in one night! The thesis statement of the book is simply Christianity is Christ. Christ isn’t a part of Christianity. He is the whole thing.

…the center, the cornerstone, the jewel in the crown of Christianity is not an idea, a system or a thing; it is not even “the gospel” as such. It is Jesus Christ.
Micheal Reeves

The book goes through why Jesus had to be fully God, fully man, Jesus death and resurrection, what Jesus doing now, and Jesus’ second coming. All in 133 pages. If anyone is a new believer, or a believer who just wants to get back to the heart of the Christian faith, I recommend reading this book. It is one of those books you can read multiple times and still be encouraged for each reading. It is also accessible enough that I would recommend giving it out for free at your Church if possible.

Christ’s Glorious Achievements by Charles Spurgeon

Spurgeon’s whole ministry was Christ centered. Every sermon pointed to Jesus and the gospel. This little volume contains seven “sermons” on different things Christ accomplished. It is another short book, only 113 pages but rich in theology. Sometimes, I find Spurgeon a little flowery in his preaching, but this volume represents his preaching at its best. I found the chapters on Christ the destroyer of death and the maker of all things new particularly edifying.

When Christ died He suffered the penalty of death on behalf of all His people, and therefore no believer now dies by way of punishment for sin, since we cannot dream that a righteous God would twice exact the penalty for one offense.
Charles Spurgeon

I recommend reading one sermon per day as a devotional leading up to Easter. It will help you focus your mind on what Christ actually did. This book turns your heart towards worship with every sermon and will deepen your wonder at all Jesus did for His Church.

Those are my book recommendations for Easter reading. I hope you choose one to read through.

Do you have any Christ centered books you read around Easter? Send me any recommendations.

An Incredible Tool for Applying Sermons to Your Life

By Adam Nesmith | November 10, 2020

Applying sermons is always on my mind. I have listened to countless sermons over the years. Some inspire me. Some stick with me.

Others, I forget before I am hardly outside the Church doors.

Perhaps you have have a similar experience. Often times, Sunday Morning Sermons can feel more like a ritual. A box to check.

You were not meant to listen to sermons passively. God’s word should have a definite impact on your life.

The reality for me is after Sunday service, my mind immediately goes to practical things like talking with other Church members or what I’m eating for lunch.

I was convicted on my need to be applying sermons after reading a small book. The book is called “Duties of a Christian Fellowship” by John Owen. One quote really stuck out to me:

“…men grow tired of hearing the word only after they have grown tired of putting it into practice.”

Church members should take personal responsibility for applying sermons their Pastor’s preaches.

Rather than passively listening to preaching, I knew I needed to meditate on the sermon. Mull it over after service. Examine myself with it. Bring it before the Lord to see how He wants my life to change.

So, I designed a workbook for myself. Every week I summarize my Pastor’s main points and then ask myself several questions.

The questions themselves I gleaned from not only the Owen’s book I mentioned above, but also this great book on being a Church member.

Even though I originally made the workbook for myself, I showed it to my Pastor. He thought it was a good idea, so we had copies printed for every Church member. We posted it on our Church website too. Now, I make it available for you.

Use this resource for personal sermon application, family devotions, and small groups at your Church.

Sermon Meditation Workbook Download

If you want further questions to ask yourself after a sermon, the application questions Puritan pastors used are incredibly helpful.

Interested in a similar tool but for kids? Click here to view the kids sermon notes my wife designed.