Tag: hospitality

Hanging Up Verses in Your House

Hanging Up Verses in Your House

My wife does an amazing job of decorating the walls of our almost-100 year old colonial. Between frames full of family pictures and tasteful art, my wife has also strategically placed Bible verses. A Psalm on the piano. A quote from Deuteronomy in my son’s bedroom. Well-known Proverbs on the stairs leading to the second story. When a plumber had to cut through one of our walls, she even wrote a quote from Romans on the white wall paper we used to cover up the hole. Until recently, however, I never thought about the benefits of hanging up verses in your house. And as I thought about it, three came to mind.

It is a reminder for yourself

Hanging up verses around your house first and foremost is a reminder to yourself. No matter how long or encouraging your quiet time is, the daily distractions and busyness can cause you to forget the very truths you and I are to treasure and live out. Sometimes in the thick of the day, you don’t have time to sit down, pause, and open your Bible. But maybe you can glance at an encouraging verse on a letterboard in your kitchen. The more avenues you have in your daily life to read and engage with the Word of God, the better. And having up verses around rooms that you inhabit is one of the easiest ways you can put truth before your eyes.

It is a discipling tool for your children

The Bible has no shortage of verses in Deuteronomy, Proverbs, and the Epistles that specifically and directly address children. My wife is very intentional with what verses she hangs in our sons’ rooms. They serve as reminders and encouragements for our family to live and function under Christ’s Lordship. Although my oldest son is still under two, sometimes he wants us to stop and read a passage from Proverbs that hangs hear the top of our stairs. I am confident that, as the years go on, having opportunities to point out these important verses to our children as we go throughout the house will be an aid in daily discipleship.

It is a visible testimony for those you have over

Having Bible verses prominently displayed in your home says something to the people you have over. Your family and thus, by extension, your home are “taking the Lord’s name.” You are publicly identifying to those you have over that:

  1. You believe God’s word
  2. You want God’s word to be a part of your home.

Now, I won’t go so far as to say “evangelize your neighbors simply by displaying Bible verses!” Of course there is more to having a good testimony than externally decorating your walls. But don’t forget that in your home, you are creating a distinct environment that people will inhabit. You should want that environment to, both internally and externally, testify to the value and majesty and importance of God and of Christ.

Including God’s word in the very adornment of your home may be only a small and external way to show off God’s importance, but it is by no means an unimportant or unimpactful.

As a personal example, we recently had some workers over to fix some plumbing issues we have had. I noticed them several times pausing to read a section of Romans 8 we had out as well as a beautiful picture my wife found at a thrift shop containing part of Psalm 127. Now, what was the effect of them reading these verses? I cannot be sure. But I also cannot be sure when was the last time they read even one Bible verse. Perhaps the Lord can ensure that His Word in frames around a house won’t return to Him void.

Hanging up verses both decorates and disciples

God has made humans visual creatures. We even use the metaphor “seeing” to describe “knowing” or “learning” something. What do you want yourself, your family, and your guests to see when they look around your home? People often display items around their house that they value. If you and I value the Word of God, does it not make sense that we would want people to see that glorious, life-giving word as their eyes dance around our homes? There are plenty of websites and online shops that sell aesthetically pleasing Bible verses. Incorporating some into your home décor can have benefits for you, your family, and for guests that you welcome into your home.

For more of my assorted reflections on a myriad of topics, click here. If you found this post helpful, please share on social media below and subscribe.

3 Easy Ways to Reach Out to Your Neighbors

3 Easy Ways to Reach Out to Your Neighbors

I would guess if you are reading this post that you either live in an apartment or neighborhood. That means there are dozens of individuals, couples, & families who live incredibly close to you. How are you striving to get to know your neighbors better for the purpose of sharing the Gospel with them? Getting to know your neighbors can be intimidating, which is why in this post I want to go through 3 easy ways to reach out to your neighbors.

You will rarely get a good opportunity to share God’s truth with your neighbors if you don’t know them, hardly talk to them, or don’t sacrifice some of your time & open up your home for them to get to know you. The things I recommend in this post are easy in the sense that they are straightforward. You could do any or all of them today or tomorrow without needing some sort of fancy plan. But they are hard because they require valuing outreach to those around you more than you value personal time and personal space.

With that said, here are some of the most practical ways to reach out to your neighbors that I have found.

1. Invite them over for dinner

Of all the ways to reach out to your neighbors, this one is essential. There is no way around it: if you really want to get to know someone you leave close to, you are going to have to invite them over for dinner. Don’t expect to have too many deep conversations with your neighbors until you have made the first step of opening up your home. A dinner invitation is not only a necessary first step: it is also a perfect foundation for a continuing relationship with your neighbors moving forward. Your neighbors will remember the tangible, visible love you showed them by initiating and scheduling a time to get to know them.

The first dinner is the hardest, but after you actually get it on the schedule and commit to it, you’ll leave that dinner knowing your neighbors so much more than you did before. Dinner will break the ice and make both parties are more comfortable in future interactions in conversations. Not only that, but you will get a chance to clearly communicate to your neighbors that you are a Christian through blessing the food and dinner conversation. But the key here is you must initiate. Don’t wait around for your neighbors to invite you to dinner. Take the first step, as awkward as you may feel. After the first dinner, you will find it easier to extend dinner invitations in the future.

2. Leave them a baked good (and perhaps a note)

A Christian can turn baking into an indispensable tool for outreach. The simple act of sharing a delicious bread, cake, or cookie with another person is a thoughtful gesture which causes people drop their guards. I have known people who have started entire relationships by knocking on people’s doors and leaving giving them a set of cookies they have made. If going door to door is not your style, maybe leave a note with the baked goods introducing yourself.

This way to reach out to your neighbors also works after you have already had a dinner with them. Baking something has a lower time commitment then hosting a meal and it still shows that you are thinking about your neighbors. Leave a Gospel tract with a note explaining why Jesus is so important to you with your baked goods. Or write a personal note telling them how much you enjoyed your last dinner together. The possibilities (and opportunities) are endless.

Next time you are baking anything for your family, why not double the recipe and make an outreach opportunity for yourself? There are very few things people appreciate more than home-baked goods; leverage them for your neighbors’ spiritual good.

3. Invite them to join you during normal things

You perform dozens of tasks each which alone which you could easily do with a neighbor. To put another way, turn ordinary things you do throughout the week from a solitary tasks to an evangelistic opportunities. Here are just a few ideas of things you can invite another person to participate in:

  • Working out
  • Grocery shopping
  • Evening walks
  • Yard work
  • Cooking dinner (as an added bonus, you can then invite your neighbor to dinner)

What is keeping you from inviting your neighbors to participate in these activities? Most of the time it is either a personal preference (“I’d rather do these things alone”) or a cultural bias (“No one I know invites other people to do these things with them”). But if you honestly want to reach out to your neighbors, you are going to have to shift your mindset from “my home or my time after work is for me and my family only” to “my home and time are tools God has given me to use for the advancing of His kingdom.”

There are prime opportunities for outreach each week that you don’t even realize. Next time you are planning your weekly activities, go through your list and ask of each task “could I invite someone else to do this with me?” As I have written about before, you should have a list of potential people to invite to cycle through. That way if someone turns you down, you can invite someone else.

Conclusion

Reaching out to your neighbors can be scary at first. But you don’t need some grand gesture to initiate a relationship with those around you. These three ways to reach out to your neighbors are not complicated or difficult but they are some of the best ways to develop a relationship with the people who live closest to you.

It is only through opening up the home God gave you and investing the time God has allotted to you into the lives of others that you can start getting to know your neighbors. And by getting to know your neighbors you are creating opportunities so share the Gospel with them and to show them Christ’s steadfast love.

If you are interested in becoming better at hospitality, read other posts on my page “Practicing Hospitality.” Share this post on social media below if you found it helpful and subscribe so you don’t miss future posts. Follow The Average Churchman on Instagram to get more content.

How to Work Hospitality Into Your Busy Schedule

How to Work Hospitality Into Your Busy Schedule

Most Christians I have talked to like the idea of hospitality. Maybe they have read “The Gospel Comes with a House Key.” Perhaps they know a couple at their Church who is always opening up their home. But liking the idea of hospitality and actually inviting people over your house are two very different things. What is the biggest barrier to opening up your home? Oftentimes, it is scheduling. There are only 7 days in a week, so how do you work hospitality into your busy schedule?

Hospitality is having people over your house to talk with them, get to know them, and hopefully to have opportunities to speak into their lives. It is an avenue to discipleship, evangelism, and closeness with others. Hospitality is a simple concept and a much needed practice in our modern, disconnected world. Having strangers over to share a meal is one of the best ways to start meaningful relationships.

In this post, I want to you give three simple steps to start building hospitality into your week.

Step 1: Choose a day of the week you will open up your home

The first step is simple: set apart an evening for having people over your house. The best way to start a new habit is to schedule it. You aren’t going to wake up one day and decide you should have a dozen people over your house. It oftentimes starts with planning on having people over for one dinner.

Look at your typical week. Choose an evening you will keep free each week. That is the evening you will invite people over for dinner. Don’t schedule anything else for that evening. It is a time you are committing to opening up your home.

If you want to work hospitality into your busy schedule, you are going to have to commit to it.

Most good, eternal things require self-sacrifice. Hospitality is no different. You are going to have to sacrifice a night you could do something by yourself or with your family and commit to having people over.

What day do you choose? I know a couple who used to go to my Church who opened up their home every Sunday night. After Sunday night service, people would come over and fellowship around a meal to close out the Lord’s day. They had five kids, yet still managed to prioritize hospitality. I know another couple who has someone from Church over for dinner every Thursday. Sometimes, it is a visitor who just started coming to our Church who they invited over. Other times, it is a longtime member they simply want to get to know better.

My wife and I typically do Thursday night because that works best for our schedule. What is the pattern here?

If you want to open up your home, plan on opening up your home.

Get it on the calendar and make it the same day every week.

Step 2: Make a list of 5-10 people, couples, or families you want to focus on getting to know

Jesus impacted hundreds of people during His earthly ministry. But I find it interesting He focused primarily on 12 disciples, and even within that group emphasized three men to really build into. I think there is an important principle to glean from this:

You cannot disciple every single person in your local Church at the same level.

And that is freeing. Instead of trying to have every single person in the Church over your house at some point, sit down and make a list. Write out people you want to have over regularly. I would argue you should include single people in your Church, couples, and families on that list. And don’t just stop with your Church. Write down unsaved neighbors you want to get to know and have opportunities to share the gospel with.

I would limit the list to 5-10 people. You want to focus your efforts to some degree. Currently, I have 10 people I want to consistently have over. How do you choose who is on this list?

  1. Prioritize neighbors living nearby
  2. Think of people from Church who are younger than you or who you could have a disciplining relationship with
  3. Finally, add any people from Church you want to get to know better in general

Don’t feel constrained by this list. It is just a start so that you can perform step 3. You can of course have as many people over as you want. But you need to know the people you really want to focus on, the people you want to have over one-on-one and not in a larger group.

Step 3: Work through the people on the list every week until one of them agrees to come over for dinner

If you want to work hospitality into your busy schedule, you are going to have to pursue people. Remove the option of not having people over during a week. Now that you have a list, go from top to bottom and contact the people on the list one by one. Invite the first person or family over for dinner on whatever day you have set aside. If they say no, move on to the next person on the list.

Keep working through the list until you have a person agree to come over. The next week, move their name to the bottom of the list and work through it again. What is the point of this? You will have to consistently pursue the people on the list if you want to have any impact on their life. Everyone’s busy. But if you invite a person over for dinner three weeks in a row, that person will likely eventually make time for you.

You won’t make hospitality a habit if you only ask one person a week over and do nothing if they say “No”.

Having a list enables you to keep working until you get a “yes”. And as the months go by, perhaps your list will expand or shorten naturally based on who is available. Remember: these steps are only to start the habit of hospitality. As you grow and it becomes second nature, you might change your approach.

Work until hospitality is part of your busy schedule

You aren’t likely to wake up tomorrow and naturally be super social and open to having people in your home. You have to train yourself in godliness. A busy schedule should not stop you from practicing hospitality. It should drive you to work even harder to make sure you have a day set aside to open up your home and a group of people you consistently invite over.

Is hospitality hard work? Yes. But opening up your home gives you opportunities to speak into people’s lives in a way you never could in another context. As guests sit down for dinner, their guard goes down and you start to get to know each one another. Cleaning the dishes after dinner becomes an avenue to “make disciples” and an after-dinner walk gives a context for people to vocalize their doubts and struggles.

Work hospitality into your busy schedule. These three steps will get you started. But before you try any of these steps, pray God would open your heart so you open up your home joyfully to others.

Once you have people over, read this post to think through what meals to plan. Visit the “Building Relationships with Others” page to get tips on how to have meaningful conversations. If you found this post helpful, click below to share on Facebook or Twitter. Subscribe so you don’t miss out on any future posts and follow The Average Churchman on Instagram.

Meals for Practicing Hospitality

Meals for Practicing Hospitality

When my wife and I first got married, we started reading an insightful book called “The Gospel Comes with a House Key: Practicing Radically Ordinary Hospitality in Our Post-Christian World” by Rosaria Butterfield. I highly recommend it if you have not read it yet. “Hospitality” is simply having people over your house to get to know them, talk with them, and hopefully have opportunities to speak into their lives. In my experience, practicing hospitality almost always includes gathering around a meal.

So the question is: what are some good meals to make when practicing hospitality? When I was in college, my good friend and mentor had students over his house every Sunday night for a meal. Far from being boring, these meals were delicious (especially compared with college cafeteria food) and provided a context to hang out and talk after Sunday evening service.

In this post, I want discuss how to choose a meal when practicing hospitality and recommend a few meals that are ideal for having a medium to large group over for dinner. Use them at small groups, pot lucks, and any time the Church gathers for a meal or you open up your home.

What makes a good meal for having lots of people over?

Not every meal works for hosting large groups. You might have a dozen favorite recipes, but in my experience, there are three general characteristics of good meals to serve to large groups. Use these principles to narrow down what you plan to serve.

1. Easily scalable

This one is fairly obvious. If your recipe cannot serve 12 or more people, it probably isn’t a candidate for hosting larger Church groups. You don’t want to invite a group over having only made a small amount of food. Now, some recipes naturally are designed for large groups. These are perfect candidates for practicing hospitality. Other recipes might be originally for 4-5 people, but can be doubled or tripled for a larger group.

The key question to ask here is “Can I easily scale up this recipe for a large group?” If the answer is no, cook something different this time around. For example, I personally love steak. But cooking steak for a large group of people would be crazy to attempt; it just isn’t scalable. On the other hand, you can double or triple most pasta dishes without too much difficulty or extra work.

2. Cheap ingredients

When practicing hospitality, especially with a large group, the goal is to feed your guests and provide them with a context to fellowship with one another. Your goal should not be impressing them with your most expensive ingredients. Leave the truffle salt and caviar for a smaller meal. Cheap, filling ingredients like rice, pasta, and beans should be staples of larger meals. Look for recipes with basic, cheap ingredients and make sure any recipe you find does not require hundred rare seasonings.

Now, just because you should look for cheap ingredients and readily available spices does not mean your food should be bland. Part of the fun of cooking comes down to constraints and trade offs: given a certain amount of time to cook with a certain amount of ingredients, what is the most delicious meal you can make? It is a wonderful and fun challenge to limit yourself to essential ingredients and to still make a delicious meal.

3. Broad appeal

Hospitality is not the time to pull out that exotic meal you aren’t sure you will like or not. Don’t use your guests as tests for a new recipe. Stick with those meals and cuisines which has the broadest appeal. Most people have different tastes in food, different spice tolerance, and so on. Aim for recipes that most people, ages, and backgrounds would like. Ask yourself as you choose a recipe “is this something that the people coming would cook and eat on their own?”

As a side note, if your Church is like mine, you no doubt have members with food allergies or dietary restrictions. It is important to show love to these members by making meals which meet their dietary needs whenever possible. Every time you find or try a nut-free, dairy-free, vegetarian, or gluten-free recipe that you enjoy, save it for future hosting. It is always easier to make a single meal which everyone can eat instead of two different meals, one for someone with a dietary need and another for everyone else.

Some suggested meals for practicing hospitality

Armed with the principles above, I have full faith you can discern what to cook when having Church members over. However, to get you inspired, here are 6 general recipes or categories of recipes I have seen succeed when made for large groups of people. Each of these meet the criteria I gave above: scalable, cheap ingredients, and broad appeal. I have provided a couple “example recipes” for you to test drive for yourself under each category.

1. Tacos

This is a classic and it couldn’t get simpler. Brown the meat, season it, and then serve with as many toppings as you care to use. As long as you don’t make the tacos too spicy, it should be an easy to cook, easy to enjoy meal. Tacos are great because you can make them as simple or as fancy as you like. Making homemade guacamole is a great way to elevate a simple taco dinner.

Taco meat for a crowd

Homemade guacamole

2. Spaghetti Bake

I can’t tell you how many different forms of spaghetti bake I have had over the years. And you know what? Most of the time, it is a tasty, filling, crowd-pleasing meal. Italian food in general is ideal for hospitality since you can make it “in bulk” with cheap ingredients, and most people like it. As with tacos, you can make spaghetti bake as fancy as you desire; you have lots of choices. For example, you can use sausage or ground beef and you can either use homemade tomato sauce or opt for the store bought sauce.

Million-dollar Spaghetti Bake

Easy and delicious homemade pasta sauce

3. Poppy-seed Chicken

This is another recipe I have had in a couple forms of over the years. Most of the time I have had it with rice which makes it “go further” and guarantees guests leave the table full. You must remember to cook the chicken ahead of time but besides that it is a simple recipe with few ingredients.

Poppy-seed chicken

4. Pulled Pork Sandwiches

I have had pulled pork in many forms at many small group meals. There is simply no easier way to feed a large group than slow cook a pork shoulder, shred it with some barbecue sauce, and serve it with buns, coleslaw, and some chips. An added benefit of pulled pork is it is most of the time dairy free. There are dozens of recipes to choose from, some easy some complicated.

Basic, easy, delicious pulled pork

“Texas style” pulled pork

Fancier pulled pork

5. Zuppa Toscana

In the winter, a hearty soup is welcome at any table. Of all the soups I have had at different Church members’ houses, this is the most common. The combination of sausage and potatoes makes for a filling and tasty meal. If you want to mix things up, try using sweet potatoes instead of normal potatoes (I personally prefer it).

Zuppa Toscana

Similar soup but with sweet potatoes

6. Chili (Red or White)

Chili is filling and often cheap due to its use of beans. By browning meat with some seasonings and adding a couple cans of beans, you can cheaply feed a crowd. Serve the chili over rice and the meal will stretch even further. Another great characteristic of chili is you can cook it in a crock-pot. If you want to get even fancier, try making a white chicken chili. It is lighter, and has a more complex flavor in my opinion, but it will take a bit more work.

Slow cooker chili (Beef)

Slow cooker chili (Chicken)

Conclusion: Don’t let the meal keep you from hospitality

For those who don’t enjoy cooking, the meal aspect of having people over can become burdensome. I find that having a small list of “go-to” recipes can help alleviate this. Remember: the goal of having people over for dinner, especially a large group, is not to impress or draw attention to your skills as a cook. You simply want to provide a warm, welcoming context for spiritual conversation, friendship, and closeness.

For other posts I have written to help you interact in the local Church, click here. Share and subscribe below if you found this post helpful. Be sure to follow The Average Churchman on Instagram so you don’t miss any content.