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Hanging Up Verses in Your House

By Adam Nesmith | August 2, 2023

My wife does an amazing job of decorating the walls of our almost-100 year old colonial. Between frames full of family pictures and tasteful art, my wife has also strategically placed Bible verses. A Psalm on the piano. A quote from Deuteronomy in my son’s bedroom. Well-known Proverbs on the stairs leading to the second story. When a plumber had to cut through one of our walls, she even wrote a quote from Romans on the white wall paper we used to cover up the hole. Until recently, however, I never thought about the benefits of hanging up verses in your house. And as I thought about it, three came to mind.

It is a reminder for yourself

Hanging up verses around your house first and foremost is a reminder to yourself. No matter how long or encouraging your quiet time is, the daily distractions and busyness can cause you to forget the very truths you and I are to treasure and live out. Sometimes in the thick of the day, you don’t have time to sit down, pause, and open your Bible. But maybe you can glance at an encouraging verse on a letterboard in your kitchen. The more avenues you have in your daily life to read and engage with the Word of God, the better. And having up verses around rooms that you inhabit is one of the easiest ways you can put truth before your eyes.

It is a discipling tool for your children

The Bible has no shortage of verses in Deuteronomy, Proverbs, and the Epistles that specifically and directly address children. My wife is very intentional with what verses she hangs in our sons’ rooms. They serve as reminders and encouragements for our family to live and function under Christ’s Lordship. Although my oldest son is still under two, sometimes he wants us to stop and read a passage from Proverbs that hangs hear the top of our stairs. I am confident that, as the years go on, having opportunities to point out these important verses to our children as we go throughout the house will be an aid in daily discipleship.

It is a visible testimony for those you have over

Having Bible verses prominently displayed in your home says something to the people you have over. Your family and thus, by extension, your home are “taking the Lord’s name.” You are publicly identifying to those you have over that:

You believe God’s word
You want God’s word to be a part of your home.

Now, I won’t go so far as to say “evangelize your neighbors simply by displaying Bible verses!” Of course there is more to having a good testimony than externally decorating your walls. But don’t forget that in your home, you are creating a distinct environment that people will inhabit. You should want that environment to, both internally and externally, testify to the value and majesty and importance of God and of Christ.

Including God’s word in the very adornment of your home may be only a small and external way to show off God’s importance, but it is by no means an unimportant or unimpactful.

As a personal example, we recently had some workers over to fix some plumbing issues we have had. I noticed them several times pausing to read a section of Romans 8 we had out as well as a beautiful picture my wife found at a thrift shop containing part of Psalm 127. Now, what was the effect of them reading these verses? I cannot be sure. But I also cannot be sure when was the last time they read even one Bible verse. Perhaps the Lord can ensure that His Word in frames around a house won’t return to Him void.

Hanging up verses both decorates and disciples

God has made humans visual creatures. We even use the metaphor “seeing” to describe “knowing” or “learning” something. What do you want yourself, your family, and your guests to see when they look around your home? People often display items around their house that they value. If you and I value the Word of God, does it not make sense that we would want people to see that glorious, life-giving word as their eyes dance around our homes? There are plenty of websites and online shops that sell aesthetically pleasing Bible verses. Incorporating some into your home décor can have benefits for you, your family, and for guests that you welcome into your home.

For more of my assorted reflections on a myriad of topics, click here. If you found this post helpful, please share on social media below and subscribe.

Evaluating Your Child’s Profession of Faith

By Adam Nesmith | April 5, 2023

As my second son’s due date rapidly approaches, I have spent the past few weeks trying to understand the Bible’s theology of family and children. Inevitably, this led me to the question of baptism. After reading and listening to John Calvin, Charles Hodge, John Murray, John Gerstner, R. C. Sproul, and Doug Wilson on infant baptism, I can say (at this point) I still affirm the 2nd London Confession’s summary of baptism over the Westminster Confession’s. However, the next question to naturally come out of this study is “when should Reformed Baptist’s baptize their children?” And essentially this question is dependent on the further question “how do you evaluate your child’s profession of faith as a parent?” It is this question that I want to think through in this article.

The logic of the Christian family

Why is this question of evaluating your child’s profession of faith so crucial to examine? I think it comes down to the crucial realization that children growing up in a home with one or two Christian parents are in a privileged position. A full examination of the privileges of children growing up in a Christian home deserves its own separate post. But I think the point is evident when you examine the following logic:

Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God (Romans 10:17)
Children in Christian homes should be exposed to the Word of God constantly and at an early age if the Christian parent is being obedient (Deuteronomy 6, Ephesians 6:4)
Therefore, Christian parents should not be surprised if Children profess faith at a far younger age than children who grow up in homes without Christian parents

In other words, children in a Christian home are privileged to have exposure to the ordinary means by which God saves sinners from a young age. If parents are faithful in their God-given duty to train their children in the Lord, it seems logical to conclude/expect/not be surprised when (pick your favorite word) your child professes faith when they are young. And the question facing Christians with a Reformed Baptist view of baptism is how do you evaluate that child’s profession of faith to determine if they should be baptized?

How do you evaluate?

Option 1: “Am I confident that my child is truly saved?”

I think the overwhelming tendency in Reformed Baptist Churches that I have come in contact with is to try to evaluate a child’s profession with some form of the question “am I confident that my child is truly saved/regenerate/repentant?” For many, the only safe way of answering this question is to delay baptism until a child is an arbitrary age (18, 15, 12, I have read many different opinions). This is viewed as the safe option since you do not want to “inoculate” a child to the Gospel or give them false assurance that they are regenerate when they are not. Oftentimes, the “final defense” given of this position is that it is simply the wise thing to do to withhold baptism from children until they are mature and “standing on their own two feet” as it were.

Although there is a lot I can respect with this position, I fundamentally disagree on several points (in no particular order):

Why does an arbitrary age suddenly mean you are confident that a child’s profession is valid?
No matter how you spin this position, you are practically saying “I have reservations about your profession” to your child until they are a certain age
The Biblical data strongly indicates that children that professed faith were baptized into the Church and considered part of the Church (even if the children’s exact age is debated)
Baptism in the New Testament follows profession of faith and repentance, not a period of testing
The standards of evaluation applied to children in a Christian home seem higher than what a Church would use for a former pagan professing faith
In the absolute best case scenario of this position, you actively withhold from a truly regenerate child the blessings of baptism, communion, and Church membership until they are an adult
Even if it is not explicitly said, this position functionally says “Church membership is not for children”

In short, although this position has the best of intentions, I think it falls short of what is laid out in the New Testament and violates many principles of family laid out in the Old Testament. There are a number of counterarguments that could be made against my points above, but for the sake of time, I will continue to what I think is a far better question to ask of your child’s profession.

Option 2: “Are there any specific reasons that cause me to doubt my child’s profession?”

If your goal is to wait until you are 90-100% confident that your child is regenerate, you will necessarily wait a long time to baptize them. After all, the longer you wait, the more fruit you will hopefully see if your child is truly saved. But baptism in the Bible does not seem to follow a long period of fruitfulness or cross-examination by the Church. The pattern repeats across the New Testament: a person is exposed to the Gospel. They repent and profess faith. Then they are baptized.

So when evaluating your child’s profession of faith, I think a better question to ask is “are there any specific reasons that would cause me to doubt my child’s profession?” Is there a pattern of unrepentance? Does your child demonstrate an understanding of the Gospel? Is there an indifference to Christ or spiritual things? I think what is helpful about his question is it shifts the evaluation from asking “is my child a mature Christian?” to “are there signs of spiritual life and repentance or not?” And I think you and I practically do this with adults all the time. If an adult professes faith, you don’t immediately expect them to exhibit every fruit of the Spirit and then baptize them. Rather, you ask some questions and see if there are any major inconsistencies with their profession (ex. not willing to repent of a known sin) and then you welcome them into the Church, disciple them to maturity in Christ, and warn them of the dangers of departing from the faith.

As discussed in the previous section, it is logical to assume children in Christian homes will generally profess faith earlier than 18 or 21.They are still young and still have much to learn and grow into, but if they understand the Gospel and you can’t point to specific reasons to withhold baptism from them, then you should welcome them into the Church, disciple them to maturity in Christ, and warn them of the dangers of departing from the faith. Now, what specific reasons for saying you don’t affirm there profession will vary. But several I think are self-evident:

Can they accurately explain the Gospel?
Are they active in family worship?
Do they exhibit a desire for salvation?
Do they see themselves as a sinner in need of a savior?
What is their attitude towards parental discipline?
(This one is more nuanced) Are they trying to please you as parents or is there peer-pressure because other kids at Church/family are professing?
(This one is also nuanced) Do they believe anything anyone tells them? or is there some level of discernment in their thinking?

This list is not meant to be authoritative or exhaustive. And the critical reader will read these and say “aha! From this list, you seem to exclude kids from age 0-4 at least!” Perhaps that is true. My point is that your each child’s profession must be evaluated separately since each child is different and learns and grows differently. It seems reasonable to assume that even within a given Christian family God could save one child younger and one child older. If you have little to no specific reason to doubt a child’s profession of faith, Biblically I think you must baptize them. If you do have specific reason to doubt, then delay. But to operate as if you should not baptize anyone until they exhibit a high level of maturity or until they reach an arbitrary age is, in my opinion, a well-intentioned error.

Who is doing the evaluating?

The next question to answer is who is primarily responsible for evaluating you child’s profession of faith? I think a Biblical view of the household leads to the conclusion that the primary person responsible for this evaluation is the father. Fathers are the heads of the home and it is to fathers that Paul says “bring up your children in the training and instruction of the Lord.” So the responsibility, Biblically, rests first with the fathers. In other words, when your child first professes faith, your first step is not rushing them off to the Elders at your local Church to get their feedback. As head of the household and the one who is responsible for training your Children, the duty of evaluating your child’s profession of faith rests with you.

Now, does that mean you never get your Elder’s opinion? Should you go baptize your own kids as soon as you are affirm their profession? Of course not. Ideally and normally, it is your Elders who should be doing the baptism within the context of your local Church. But you as the father should be able to go alongside your child and be a witness to the Elders that there is no reason to doubt your child’s profession. Your Elders should trust your evaluation in this matter and you should submit to any questioning or concerns the Elders have. But fundamentally, you cannot “outsource” the responsibility for evaluating your child’s profession of faith to the Eldership. You either affirm your child in the context of the home and then go to the Church leadership. Or you do not affirm your child’s profession and continue to teach them.

What is at stake?

Finally, after reading this long post, you might ask “what is at stake with all of this?” Is it really a big deal to simply wait until a child is a teenager or grown to baptize them? I personally think it is. Beyond the reasons already discussed, my chief concern is that you and I don’t treat our children as worse than an unbeliever in our attempt to guard Church membership or avoid the trap of easy believism. Can God save children? Does God save children? Could God use the faithful obedience of Christian parents to save children at a young age? If the answer to this question is “yes” than to withhold baptism is to treat a professing child as worse than a pagan off the street who professes faith. In the case of the latter, as long as there is no reason to doubt that person’s profession, baptism and communion are not withheld. So why would you wait to baptize you child and welcome them into the Church if you have no reason to doubt his or her profession?

Will there be false professions? Of course. There are plenty of false professions among adults and the New Testament gives clear instructions for how to deal with them. Is our job to try to catch every false profession or withhold means of grace until we personally are assured of someone’s regeneration? Should our Church practice be based on risk mitigation or obedience to the text of Scripture? You and I are not God and, to riff off of Spurgeon, people don’t walk around with “Elect” written on their foreheads. If that were the case, deciding which children to baptize and when would be easy. But since that is not the case, the best you and I can do is carefully, prayerfully, and thoughtfully evaluate our child’s profession. And if there is no cause for alarm, we should baptize them into the Church and continue to disciple this child in the faith who also happens to be an actual child.

For more of my assorted reflections on a myriad of topics, click here. If you found this post helpful, please share on social media below and subscribe. For a helpful external post discussing baptism with links to various positions, click here.

Family Worship is Incremental and Iterative

By Adam Nesmith | July 18, 2022

When I was a single college student, I operated under the assumption that family worship is simple to implement and execute. I expected to find the “perfect formula” soon after I was married and then spend the rest of my life executing that perfect plan. How wrong I was. I am sure for some people, implementing family worship is easy and straightforward. But I would wager for most people, even though you have a desire to start and continue regular family worship, you find that it is easier said than done. This can quickly become discouraging if you don’t remember that family worship is typically incremental and iterative.

Incremental: Little victories build to bigger victories

What do I mean by incremental? Oftentimes, your family worship will not start with a long, complicated liturgy right off the bat. There are a dozen different things you can do with your time: Bible reading, catechism memorization, hymn singing, prayer for your local Church, and on and on the list goes. If you try to do too much all at once, the habit of worshiping together as a family each day actually becomes more difficult to nurture. There is a lot you could do with your family worship time. The question is what is most realistic, spiritually edifying, and glorifying to God way to spend the time that you have.

If you want to start worshiping God together as a family on a consistent basis, start small. Focus on one or two activities primarily, like reading a chapter of the Bible together and then singing a hymn. Your family worship time does not need to become a daily mini-Church service right away. In fact, biting off more than you can chew with family worship is, in my opinion, one of the main reasons so many families with good intentions end up giving up on it. Start small and build up as you go. If you can win little victorious like getting the family together after dinner to read the Bible briefly, then you can slowly add in more features to your family worship time as you go.

Iterative: Changing your family worship as your family changes

“To everything there is a season” the Preacher in Ecclesiastes says. This is true with family worship as well: what you do when your family is young will look different than when your family grows up. Even once you slowly build up your family worship into the time that you want it to be, life and schedule changes will often require you to change your perfectly planned set up. Rather than fighting against the reality that worshiping as a family looks different at each stage, embrace it. If your kids are young and you prioritize singing hymns, great. As they grow up and you want to teach them the catechism, take out some hymn singing time to add that in.

You know your family’s needs and the nuances of their daily schedule better than anyone but the Lord. So don’t feel bad if you have to adjust what you do or when you do it to maximize the time you have worshiping God together as a family. At the end of the day, the goal of family worship should be nothing less than glorifying God and delighting in Him together. Of developing the habit of consistently meditating on God’s infinite value and greatness as a family and then responding accordingly. There is no “one way” or “one method” to do this perfectly in the context of family worship. Be flexible and keep God the main thing, not your planned structure or schedule.

Conclusion: Don’t despise the day of small things

Family worship will look different for each family. And that’s okay. The goal isn’t to have the most complicated or longest time worshiping God together as a family. It is to build the habit of seeking the Lord’s face together as a family unit. The end goal is praising God together and exposing your family consistently to the Word. If you find that it is difficult to develop this habit within your family, perhaps you are trying to do too much at once. Or maybe you need to adjust what “family worship” looks like for your family in this season of life.

If your family worship is short and unimpressive in your eyes, my council would be “don’t despise the day of small things”. Any time worshiping God together as a family is precious and important and beneficial. God can use the small act of faithfulness in gathering your family together to pray or sing or read His Word for His great ends. There will always be more that you want to do with your family worship time. But by starting small and incrementally building and by adjusting your plans as needed you can ensure that your family keeps up the habit of growing in the knowledge and love of the Lord together.

For more of my assorted reflections on a myriad of topics, click here. If you found this post helpful, please share on social media below and subscribe. Follow The Average Churchman on Instagram for more content.

Unexpected Lessons From my Son’s Birth

By Adam Nesmith | August 14, 2021

The past week has been a whirlwind. I had to take a break from posting because my son was finally born. The past four days have changed me in too many ways to count. But I thought I would record some unexpected lessons from my son’s birth.

Sometimes the greatest pain proceeds the greatest joys

The first of the unexpected lessons I learned from my son’s birth came from watching my wife go through labor pains. I have always hated seeing my wife in pain, so watching her go through contraction after contraction was incredibly difficult. As the pain intensified, I kept asking myself “what can I do to help her as she goes through this pain?”

The answer came from a phrase a lady from our church shared with us: “You are working to meet your baby.” In other words, the pain my wife was going through was not futile or meaningless. It had a goal. A purpose. And that purpose was to meet our son.

It was watching my wife go through labor pains that helped me understand Hebrews 12:2. Jesus went through the suffering and shame of the cross for the joy set before Him. The joy of our salvation was purchased through the suffering of the Son of God.

looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.
Hebrews 12:2 ESV, emphasis added

Both my wife and I wanted to have a son. But because of the curse of sin, the only way to reach the joy of parenthood was through the pain of labor. God has built in an insightful lesson into the common grace of child birth. We as humans simply want the joy. Immediately. Without delay and without effort. Suffering and pain are especially undesirable for us.

But in this fallen world, most of the joys God has in store for us lead first through pain. That isn’t to say you should love the pain. Rather, like Christ, you should look past the pain to what lies ahead.

To persevere, you must keep the proper perspective.

And if your perspective is fixed on your circumstances or whatever pain you are feeling, you will never see the joy God has in store.

God promises sanctification, not quick relief from suffering

The second of the unexpected lessons I learned from my son’s birth came through the first two nights at the hospital. My wife had only gotten one hour of sleep within 24 hours, so I knew I needed to be the one to stay up with my son. Just for perspective, even in college I had never pulled a straight “all-nighter” and it has been a while since I went with less than 5 hours of sleep.

But as the Lord would have it, the first two nights after my son’s birth included back to back all-nighters. It was truly like living my worst nightmare. I would soothe our son, put him in the bassinet hoping against hope he would stay asleep. Then, I would crawl on the hard hospital couch, pull up my thin sheets only to hear a whimper. Then a cry. Next? A full out meltdown.

Each time I laid my son down more exhausted than the previous cycle, I would pray to God “Please Lord, let my son sleep!” The answer came within 20 minutes: God’s sovereign will declared that I would not be getting sleep. My patience was tested more in those first two nights than they have in the past two years at least.

Reflecting back on the hospital, I realized God never promised or “owed me” letting my son sleep through the night. God’s will for my life is for my sanctification, making me like Jesus in character and action. But all I wanted God to give me quick, instant relief. To make it all go away and make it all better.

But God did not give me relief those first couple nights. And that was a good thing. By forcing me to stay up all night and sacrifice myself for my son and wife, the Lord taught me endurance. He taught me what it means to rely on His strength.

Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”
2 Corinthians 12:8-9a ESV emphasis added

I pleaded with the Lord a lot more than three times to let my son sleep. But instead of answering my request how I wanted it answered, God instead supplied the strength and mental focus I needed to stay up with my son. And in the end, my character is stronger now than it would have been if God has just given me instant relief.

Plans are great; God’s will is better

The final of the unexpected lessons I learned from my son’s birth is one I learned when the COVID pandemic completely changed my wife and my wedding plans. That lesson is one I constantly need to hear: I am not the master of my own fate. Or to put it in Biblical terms:

The heart of man plans his way,
but the Lord establishes his steps.
Proverbs 16:9 ESV

My wife and I went into the labor process with a marvelous birth plan. We knew what we wanted, what we didn’t want, and pictured how it would go. Then, after 9 hours of labor, my wife needed an emergency C-section: the one thing we didn’t want to happen. Within 5 minutes, my wife was wheeled away and I was left with a written out birth plan that no longer meant anything.

God has a persistent and gracious habit of reminding you that He is Lord of our lives. Not us.

In the end, wife and child were happy and I could not have been more pleased with how the labor went. Sure it wasn’t “according to plan” or “how we envisioned it.” But as I have written before, our modern culture is obsessed with somehow finding the perfect path to reach our goals.

But God alone has all wisdom and foreknowledge. My wife and I enjoyed planning what we wanted in our labor, but in the end, we had no power to bring our plan to pass. God alone has that power. As Paul says in Romans, from God, through God, and to God is everything. That includes our son and how he entered the world.

Conclusion

I hope to return to writing more regularly in the weeks ahead. But honestly, I have appreciated the time to just experience the novelty and life changing experience of becoming a parent. God is already growing my character and perspective. These are only three of many lessons I have been reflecting on. One of the great blessings of knowing the God of the universe through Jesus Christ is being able to look back on experiences and say

God ordained that situation as part of His plan for my life
God has a purpose in letting me go through that circumstance
Therefore, I can look at everything I experience and ask “What is God teaching me?”

Whether you are married, single, child-less, or with a full quiver, don’t ever stop reflecting on what God is showing you in each season of life.

This post if part of an ongoing series of reflection pieces called “What I learned from…” Read other posts in this series here. If you found this post helpful, share and subscribe below. Follow The Average Churchman on Instagram to get thought-provoking quotes and resource recommendations weekly.